Here during Preen, we’re entirely wakeful that adult life doesn’t always go as uniformly (and demeanour as beautiful) as curated Instagram feeds. We all face hurdles amidst all a good things. Meet Mikka Wee, a former food editor-turned-working gal in Singapore, who’s about to share all a ups and downs that come with adulting and living. Welcome to Bless This Mess!
Before we met my fiancé, I’ve always been so set on cruising solo in this lifetime. A integrate of long-term relations left wrong coerced me to make a wordless vouch to myself that we would never, ever settle down. But life has a humorous approach of jolt adult your path, so here we am today.
One thing that we haven’t finished in my 3 years of being in a attribute was transport alone. I’ve always wanted to burst on a event to squeeze my trek and book a pointless flight, partly to rekindle a feeling of being unknown in a unfamiliar land, though mostly to knowledge drifting solo one final time before we got hitched. And during last, an event opened, and so, we jumped in on it. we requisitioned a outing to Bali, that flooded my fiancé with dismay since there was a volcanic tear warning (I didn’t know before we booked; it was a chair sale).
Ask me about “What we Learned About Traveling Solo 1.0” looked like, and I’d tell we that it was one of a many pleasing and smashing things I’ve ever finished for myself. I’d inspire we to do it, too. I’d speak about leisure and wanderlust and hostel friendships and a affability of strangers. But I’m essay this chronicle 2.0 in a opposite deteriorate of my life right now. And in box we were wondering, I’m not in hold with my hostel friends anymore. However, we still trust in a affability of strangers.
So, behind to a trip. we was intensely vehement and dead-set on going, notwithstanding my fiancé’s defence for me to reconsider. We finally reached a concede wherein we would book my Airbnb in Canggu instead of Ubud (so it’s over from a volcano and closer to a airport). we craved a feeling of environment feet on new domain with my possess association (I’ve never explored in Canggu before), and removing some much-needed downtime for thoughtfulness and introspection. I’m an introvert, so we unequivocally get to recharge when we have my me-time. It was also a unequivocally wily time in my life filled with transitions and uncertainties, so we was usually unequivocally looking brazen to relaxing my mind and lovely my spirit—and what improved place to do this than in Bali?
Everyone has his or her possess “magical place,” and Bali is it for me. I’ve always suspicion of Bali as one of a Thin Spaces that always leaves me rejuvenated and allows me to feel light as a feather. It was my initial time to transport alone in 3 years, so we can suppose how pumped adult we was!
It was a good-sized trip—four days and 3 nights. we explored cafés in Canggu, rode on motorbikes to a beach where we watched monumental sunsets and munched on a tastiest grilled corn EVER (it was brushed with butter, honeyed chili, and lemongrass). we done certain to punch off each heart of that life-changing cob and downed it with an ice-cold bottle of Bintang Radler. we played a lot with Indie, a white Pomeranian in my Airbnb, finally finished a Telltale diversion we got on Steam a year ago, watched Lady Gaga’s Netflix documentary, and finished a whole second deteriorate of Stranger Things.
I also had coffee dates with myself, free-writing all I’ve kept in my mind on my journal, essay about my goals and things we was looking brazen to in a subsequent few months (wedding included!). we took myself on a integrate of good lunches unaware a rice paddies; feasting over uninformed seafood and my favorite deep-fried steep and finding a enchanting Indonesian splash called Jamu.
I went on a day outing to Ubud to see a Vedic astrologer and try a art marketplace (I never get sleepy of it!). we wanted to do some yoga as well, though it was that time of a month so we was cramping up. we also treated myself to a deep-healing massage and nightfall beach strolls to relax my mind and assistance me feel during ease.
It might seem like we did a lot, though we consider we spent many of my time usually inside my Airbnb, throwing adult on my games, my shows, and vouchsafing my mind simply dull itself. No hurries, no worries. But we guess, my biggest take-way from my outing was that we got to learn a lot of things about myself, that I’m blissful that we did before we got married.
To tell we a truth, we overthink a lot. we get uncertain a lot. And a outrageous partial of myself can get flattering cynical, that in lapse formula to this cycle of overthinking, insecurity, anxiety—and afterwards behind to overthinking. It’s not a flattering picture. However, this outing helped me know myself a bit better, and one thing that we unequivocally schooled during this brief getaway was that 90 percent of a time, we unequivocally wished we was with my fiancé so that we could suffer a things we did together.
It was unequivocally uncanny for me to get to this indicate as well—me, someone who wrote with a moniker “Tiny Traveller,” consultant chair sale hunter, master backpacker, solo traveller—only to comprehend in a finish that there is so many law in what one of my life inspirations, Alexander Supertramp, said: “Happiness is usually genuine when shared.”
Sure, we felt happy being alone during Bali. we was means to “scratch that itch” of roving solo though anyone else’s time to consider of than my own. But there is a opposite kind of fun when precious practice are common with people we love. Ask my fiancé, I’ve always been a brat about wanting to fly solo, and now that we was means to do it, we schooled that we would rather transport with him than alone.
We’re building a possess family soon, and while we have my issues with mine, maybe my choice to always do things on my possess was usually me being realistic about vouchsafing people in. The people and this universe could get flattering troublesome many of a time, though what we destroy to see infrequently is that wish always exists. And so does love. And I’m not here to speak about rainbows and butterflies, because, really, we can be utterly a miser when it comes to articulate about a politics of a world. But things that we can favour on a own; things like honesty and teamwork and trust. we find myself wavering to let people in since damn right could it get extreeemely uncomfortable, and messy, and insecure.
But we know what? It’s value it.
Disclaimer: The views voiced here are only those of a author in her private ability and do not in any approach paint a views of Preen.ph, or any other entity of the Inquirer Group of Companies.
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